Questions to Ask a Potential Marriage Partner

Deciding to marry someone is a big step, and asking the right questions early on can help you determine if your partner is the right fit for a lifelong commitment. It’s important to have open, honest conversations about your values, goals, and expectations to build a strong, lasting relationship.

Here are some key areas to focus on when talking with a potential partner.

1. Faith and Beliefs

Discussing faith is crucial, especially if you desire a Christ-centered marriage. Ask your partner about their beliefs and how important faith is to them. Are they open to praying together, attending church, or growing spiritually as a couple?

Understanding your partner’s spiritual journey helps ensure you’re aligned on this key aspect of life.

Questions to consider:

1. What role does faith play in your life?
2. How do you see us growing spiritually as a couple?
3. How important is prayer and worship in our relationship?

2. Family and Children

Talk about your views on family and whether you both want children. Discuss parenting styles, expectations about roles in the family, and how you plan to support each other in raising a family. This helps you both understand if your future visions align.

Questions to ask:

• How do you feel about having children, and how many would you like?
• What are your expectations regarding family roles?
• How do you plan to manage relationships with extended family?

3. Finances

Money is one of the most common causes of conflict in marriages. It’s important to discuss how you’ll manage finances together. Are you both savers, spenders, or somewhere in between? Discuss budgeting, financial goals, and how to handle debt or shared expenses.

Financial questions to ask:

• What are your financial goals, and how do you manage your money?
• How do you feel about combining finances after marriage?
• How should we handle big purchases and budgeting as a couple?

4. Career and Life Goals

Your career paths and life goals should complement each other. Discuss how your career plans might affect your future together. Are you both supportive of each other’s ambitions?

This helps you plan for a balanced life, where both partners feel valued.

Career-related questions:

• What are your career goals, and how do they fit into our future together?
• How do you see us balancing work and family life?
• Are you open to relocating or adjusting your career for the relationship?

5. Character and Emotional Health

Understanding each other’s character and emotional health is vital for a stable relationship. Talk about how you both handle stress, conflict, and emotions. Are you both committed to personal growth and emotional well-being?

Questions to assess emotional health:

• How do you handle stress or disagreements?
• What personal challenges have shaped who you are today?
• Are you open to personal growth and seeking help if needed?

Ensuring a Strong Foundation

Asking these questions helps lay the foundation for a strong, lasting marriage. Open dialogue about your values, beliefs, and goals ensures that you and your partner are on the same page. These conversations aren’t about getting perfect answers but about understanding each other deeply and making informed decisions.

If you’re looking for more tips on courtship and building strong relationships, visit other youth and courtship pages on HFA for practical advice and insights.

• Watch a video
• Bible verses about finding a marriage partner
• Join the conversation

We hope these questions have inspired you to consider the commitment you’re contemplating, to make sure you both know if this person is right for you. Ready to sit down with your partner? Take the time now!

 Dive deeper with this video on marriage discussions!

Disclaimer: Hope for Africa is not affiliated with the following video. It is simply being provided as a helpful resource for marriage preparation.

10 Things to Discuss Before Marriage | Know who you are Marrying! by The Yambors

Marriage is a marathon not a sprint. Not only does it require daily work during marriage but the prep BEFORE marriage is just as important! Today, we will be touching on 10 topics to discuss before marriage. We hope that you get value from this conversation and listen to all 10 points all the way through.

1. Current finances
2. Financial expectations
3. Children
4. Religious Beliefs
5. Partner expectations
6. Sexual expectations
7. Family background
8. Mental health
9. Political views
10. Lifestyle expectations

10 Bible verses about finding a marriage partner

Compiled by the Hope For Africa staff on September 20, 2024

Bible verses related to “qualities to ask for in a marriage partner” from the New King James Version (NKJV) by Relevance

• 2 Corinthians 6:14
  “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?”
  Explanation: A partnership with those who do not share the same values and principles with us or whose character, beliefs and interests lack Christian integrity is a recipe for failure. God also prohibits it to spare us pain from such associations.
• 1 Corinthians 7:39
  “A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.”
  Explanation: A potential marriage partner should be willing and ready to keep the marriage until death separates you.
• Mark 10:6-9
  “But from the beginning of the creation, God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
  Explanation: A potential partner should aspire to follow God’s principle of marriage between a man and a woman and also not come into a relationship with divorce in mind.
• Ephesians 5:31
  “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
  Explanation: Partners contemplating marriage should strive for a close union between them that exceeds a parent-child relationship.
• Proverbs 18:22
  “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord.”
  Explanation: If we seek God’s guidance, He will be willing to help us find a prudent, God-fearing partner for a happy marriage (Proverbs 19:14).
• 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
  “Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.”
  Explanation: A prospective partner should be imbued with God’s love which will be revealed in selflessness, patience, kindness, humility, honesty, purity of life, self-control and forgiveness.
• Colossians 3:12-14
  “Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection.”
  Explanation: A potential partner shouldn’t be a person who holds grudges, is arrogant, or quarrelsome but loving and Christlike.
• Proverbs 12:4
  “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.”
  Explanation: Carefully and prayerfully contemplate the character traits of your partner. An immodest, weak, immoral and wasteful partner will drain your strength.
• Hebrews 13:4
  “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”
  Explanation: Choose someone who believes, appreciates and respects God’s principles of marriage such as chastity, purity and faithfulness.
• Ecclesiastes 4:12
  “Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
  Explanation: A companionship founded on love, trust and unity will offer protection and support to partners in trying times.

Topics and verses are generated from multiple resources and are reviewed by our team. If a verse or topic does not belong or is missing, please contact us. Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Thoughts on marriage preparation

Here’s your chance to participate! What do you think about these areas we’ve recommended considering before marriage? Comment your question or observations below!

Discussions are moderated. Please read our Comment Policy.