What to do when there’s bullying?

Bullying is a painful experience that affects many young people. But it’s important to know that you are not alone and there are ways to handle it.

Whether you’re facing bullying yourself, witnessing it, or supporting someone who is being bullied, there are steps you can take to address the situation with wisdom, confidence, and compassion.

By seeking help, standing firm in your values, and showing kindness in the face of cruelty, you can navigate bullying in a way that honours both yourself and others.

Recognizing Bullying and Its Impact

Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behaviour targeting a vulnerable victim that involves a real or perceived power imbalance.

It can take many forms—physical, verbal, emotional, or even online (cyberbullying).

Bullying behaviours may include threats, spreading rumours, physically or verbally attacking someone, or excluding someone from a group on purpose.

It is often repeated, or has the potential to be repeated. And over time, and can have lasting effects on the person being targeted.

Bullying can leave victims feeling isolated, scared, and powerless.

Recognizing the signs of bullying is the first step in addressing it. Whether it’s through hurtful words, exclusion, or direct physical harm, bullying aims to tear someone down.

But you can take steps to stop it.

Once you understand what bullying looks like, it’s important to know how to respond.

So, what are some practical steps you can take to deal with bullying?

Practical Steps for Dealing with Bullying

1. Seek help from trusted adults: One of the most important things you can do is talk to a trusted adult—whether it’s a teacher, parent, or counsellor. They can provide advice, intervene, and help you find a solution.
2. Stand up for yourself with courage: If you feel safe, calmly standing up to a bully can send a strong message that you won’t tolerate their behaviour. Assert yourself, but avoid responding with anger or aggression.
3. Report the bullying: Don’t hesitate to report bullying to someone in authority. This is not being weak; it’s protecting yourself and others from further harm.

Standing up for yourself takes courage, but what about responding to a bully in a way that shows strength and grace?

Responding with Grace and Assertiveness

While it’s tempting to respond to bullying with anger or frustration, the Bible teaches us to respond with kindness and grace, even in difficult situations.

Proverbs 15:1 reminds us that “a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (ESV).

Responding with assertiveness means calmly and firmly letting the bully know that their actions are unacceptable, without resorting to name-calling or retaliation.

If standing up for yourself doesn’t seem possible or safe, always prioritise finding help and safety first. But if the opportunity arises, showing confidence and kindness can sometimes defuse the situation and discourage further bullying.

Witnessing bullying: What Can You Do?

If you witness bullying, you have the opportunity to make a difference.

Too often, people stay silent out of fear or indecision, but standing up for others can change the dynamic of the situation.

As a bystander, you can:

• Speak up for the victim: If it feels safe, step in and tell the bully to stop. Sometimes, knowing they are being watched is enough to make a bully back down.
• Offer support: Reach out to the person being bullied, showing them that they are not alone. Offer a listening ear or help them report the incident.
• Encourage action: If you’re unsure how to intervene, tell a trusted adult about what’s happening.

Standing up for others not only helps the victim but also creates a culture of respect and kindness.

Creating a Supportive Environment

A supportive environment is key to preventing and stopping bullying.

Whether at school, in your community, or online, creating spaces where everyone feels safe and respected makes a difference.

You can help foster this kind of environment by being kind, encouraging others to speak up, and treating everyone with dignity.

How to create a positive environment:

• Be inclusive: Make an effort to include others, especially those who might feel left out.
• Speak with kindness: Use your words to build others up, not tear them down.
• Encourage reporting: Remind your friends and peers that it’s okay to ask for help when needed.

When you take steps to create a supportive environment, you not only reduce bullying but also promote positive and healthy relationships among your peers.

Trusting God’s Guidance and Protection

In times of bullying, it can be comforting to remember that God is always with you. Psalm 46:1 tells us that “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble” (NKJV).

Turn to God in prayer for strength, wisdom, and protection as you navigate difficult situations. Trust that He will guide you and give you the courage to defend yourself or bring you someone to help you.

For more guidance on navigating relationships and challenges, visit other youth and relationships pages on HFA.

• Watch a video
• Bible verses about responding to bullying
• Join the conversation

The following information is designed to help you gain understanding of bullying. There are biblical principles to give you ideas on how to respond in difficult situations. Let’s start by watching a video that explores the experiences of abuse and healing.

Gain perspective on the subject with this video

Disclaimer: Hope for Africa is not affiliated with the following video. It is simply being provided as a helpful resource for navigating abuse.

3ABN Today Live – “7 Faces of Abuse” (TDYL190011) – By Three Angels Broadcasting Network (3ABN)

Join John and Angela Lomacang along with Lizzie Chambwa for this insightful program discussing red flags and warning signs of domestic violence and how to break free.

Bible verses about responding to bullying

Compiled by the Hope For Africa staff on September 23, 2024

Bible verses related to “What to do when there’s bullying?” from the New King James Version (NKJV) by Relevance

• Leviticus 19:18
  “Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD.”
  Explanation: While we need to seek safety from abusive situations, being vengeful or hating those who have done us wrong only brings other problems.
• Matthew 5:44
  “But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.”
  Explanation: Pray for those who bully you to know Jesus and be converted.
• Romans 12:19-20
  “Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.”
  Explanation: God will avenge his children for the afflictions brought upon them.
• Ephesians 4:29
  “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.”
  Explanation: We are to resist the temptation to speak words that will misrepresent God’s character.
• 1 John 3:15
  “Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him.”
  Explanation: We are to love even those who hate us instead of hating or slandering them.
• Proverbs 16:27
  “An ungodly man diggeth up evil: and in his lips there is as a burning fire.”
  Explanation: Plotting evil against our neighbours is ungodly.
• Proverbs 24:17
  “Rejoice not when thine enemy falleth, and let not thine heart be glad when he stumbleth.”
  Explanation: It’s better to show love and pity to those overcome by temptation than to rejoice.
• Matthew 7:12
  “Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.”
  Explanation: Do to others what you would want them to do to you if you were in their situation.
• Romans 12:18
  “If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.”
  Explanation: Seeking peace with those around us can prevent lots of trouble with them.
• 1 Peter 3:9
  “Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.”
  Explanation: Do good to all people, even if they don’t deserve it.
• Psalm 82:3-4
  “Defend the poor and fatherless: do justice to the afflicted and needy. Deliver the poor and needy: rid them out of the hand of the wicked.”
  Explanation: We are to defend, protect and care for the oppressed and the needy.
• Colossians 3:8
  “But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth.”
  Explanation: Controlling our emotions and words can help us be witnesses to the bullies.
• Ephesians 4:31-32
  “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”
  Explanation: Kindness, forgiveness and righteousness are great Christian virtues to live by.
• James 1:19
  “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.”
  Explanation: Thinking before acting or speaking should be exercised at all times.

Topics and verses are generated from multiple resources and are reviewed by our team. If a verse or topic does not belong or is missing, please contact us. Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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