Christian Values for Courtship

Courtship, guided by Christian values, is a journey toward a Christ-centered marriage.

It’s about more than just dating; it’s a time of intentional, God-honoring growth where both partners seek to glorify God in their relationship.

By following Biblical principles, couples can build a strong foundation for a lasting, fulfilling union.

So, what are the key Christian values that guide a healthy courtship?

1. Purity: Guarding Hearts and Bodies

Purity is one of the most emphasized values in Christian courtship.

The Bible teaches that our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19-20), and therefore, we are called to honor God with our bodies.

Purity isn’t just about physical boundaries—it also extends to emotional and spiritual purity. This means keeping Christ at the center of the relationship and guarding both your heart and mind.

Practical Steps for Maintaining Purity:

• Set Clear boundaries: Discuss and agree on boundaries early in the relationship to prevent temptation.
• Accountability: Involve trusted friends or mentors who can hold you accountable to your commitment to purity.
• Prayer: Pray together for strength and guidance as you navigate your relationship.

2. Mutual Respect: Valuing Each Other as God’s Creation

Mutual respect is crucial in any God-honoring relationship. The Bible calls us to “love one another with brotherly affection” (Romans 12:10).

In courtship, this means respecting your partner’s thoughts, feelings, and boundaries. It’s about seeing each other as valuable individuals made in God’s image and treating each other with kindness, patience, and honor.

Ways to foster respect:

• Listen actively: Make an effort to understand your partner’s perspective and show respect even in disagreements.
• Encourage growth: Support each other’s spiritual and personal growth, seeking ways to help one another become more like Christ.
• Speak kindly: Use words that build up rather than tear down (Ephesians 4:29).

3. Intentionality: Purposeful Courtship Focused on Marriage

Courtship is intentional—it’s about discerning whether marriage is God’s will for you as a couple.

Unlike casual dating, Christian courtship is focused on building a relationship that honors God and prepares both partners for marriage.

Throughout this journey, it’s important to seek God’s will together, praying for wisdom and clarity about your future.

How to Be Intentional in Courtship:

• Pray together: Regularly pray for God’s guidance in your relationship, asking for wisdom in discerning His will.
• Have meaningful conversations: Discuss your goals, values, and visions for the future to ensure you’re aligned.
• Seek counsel: Involve spiritual mentors or family members who can provide biblical insight and guidance.

4. Spiritual Growth: Growing Closer to God Together

A strong courtship is one where both individuals grow closer to God as they grow closer to each other.

In 2 Corinthians 6:14, the Bible advises us not to be “unequally yoked.”

A Christ-centered relationship helps both partners build their faith and walk together in spiritual unity. By making Christ the cornerstone of your relationship, you not only deepen your connection with one another but also strengthen your bond with God.

Ways to Foster Spiritual Growth Together:

• Study the Bible together: Make time for joint Bible study and reflection to keep God’s Word at the center of your relationship.
• Attend church together: Worship together and engage in Christian community for support and accountability.
• Encourage each other’s faith journey: Encourage your partner to pursue personal spiritual growth, and celebrate their progress.

5. Prayer and Accountability: Inviting God into the Courtship

Prayer should be the foundation of your relationship. By inviting God into your courtship through regular prayer, you seek His will, wisdom, and blessing.

In addition, having accountability—whether from spiritual mentors or a trusted community—can help you stay on track, ensuring that your relationship remains Christ-centered and healthy.

Practical ways to involve prayer and accountability:

• Pray daily for each other: Lift each other up in prayer, asking for God’s guidance, protection, and strength in your relationship.
• Join an accountability group: Surround yourselves with Christian friends or mentors who can offer support and biblical advice.
• Reflect together: Regularly reflect on how your relationship is growing in alignment with God’s will.

Building a Christ-Centered Foundation

A courtship rooted in Christian values lays the groundwork for a marriage that glorifies God.

By focusing on purity, respect, intentionality, and spiritual growth, couples prepare for a life together that is grounded in faith.

Remember, courtship is not just about discovering if you are compatible—it’s about growing in Christ and preparing for a God-honoring marriage.

If you’re ready to learn more about applying Christian principles in your relationships, visit other youth and courtship pages on HFA for deeper insights and practical guidance.

How have you considered Christian values in your own dating relationship? Learn more through our video below. And for other things to discuss during dating, check out our article on the importance of financial stability while dating.